Oh man! I have been so busy. I am currently in school and class just started back last week so it has taken me a few days to get back into the groove. My work load is a doozy right now. But I will be able to juggle. It will just take a little time and then it will be time for my new classes to start. Plus I have been sick and the kids have been sick.

Unfortunatelt, Angelica is sick, too. It is really hard on me to see her sick. She can't even really cough well then it all builds up in her throat. I am so scared that she is going to choke one day. It is terrifying!

Also, on a current front, I found some interesting statistics about the VCP. It is obvious frmo these statistics that the Program is not operating as intended and the reform bill isn't closed, it is just stalled. I really need to garner a lot of attention on this issue. I have emailed the Chairperson of the Committee on Government Reform, who originally sponsored the bill.

Please, please, forward this blog to anyone and everyone who may be interested or just wants to help us get the government program on the right track. It is hard, this early in my story to understand the magnitude of wrongdoing being perpetrated on families this early in my story but it will all come out and become very clear. The government is constantly backing and requiring new vaccines but nothing is being done to help those, child or adult, who have been injured, or even killed by vaccine reactions. They tell you that for health and safety all must have these vaccines but when an injury occurs they make you feel as though you did something wrong or that surely your child (or yourself, if an adult) are defective. There is a huge surplus in the fund due to the delays and loopholes they find to prevent and/or delay payment. So, if you guys could help me spread the word and gather interest, please do. Pass on the link. I would be more than happy to email back and forth with those interested in helping.

Well, back to the story...

Well, I learned as much as I could about the Vaccine Compensation Program (VCP) and learned that while I could get any attorney or even file myself, it would be in my best interest to obtain the serices of an attorney that specializes in the VCP in order to have it go through as smoothly as possible.

Little did I know that the government makes it as difficult as possible regardless. (Boy do I wish I had smilies here...I would have real mean one up right now)

So after searching for a bit, I found one I was comfortable with and seemed to be very knowledgable in the program. They have been involved since the programs inception. They were very nice and explained what I needed to do.

Of course they would have to go over the records but it seemed, from my accounting of events, that it would be no problem. Her injuries followed the vaccine injury chart closely.

They sent me all the paperwork and there was a lot of it! I had to submit all info on myself and her. Every OB, every hospital, all doctors seen, even in the hospital. There were a ton of release forms. They had to request all of her records both before and after her reaction.

The case did seem to just stop for awhile (like over a year) while records were requested, which we had to pay for. Finally I got fed up and I had an aquaintance that was still a member of the Bar in DC and Virginia. She told me who to call and what to ask and she began making phone calls to her contacts as well.

Boy, did that start a storm. Apparently we touched a nerve somewhere. Next thing you know my attorney was calling regularly and we were finally getting the last of the records submetted and officially filed.

This was in 2002.

Thus began the true journey because now the case was official and in the system. Supposedly there will be deadlines. Our attorney did say, after looking at the records, that it should be a slam dunk. My daughter had a reaction that virtually read off of the vaccine injury table. Both the timeline and the actual injury. When I read the vaccine injury table the first time, I actually gasped! It could have been written about my daughter.

Meanwhile my daughter and my family were growing and thriving.

Angelica went through a couple of years where she was sick a lot and since I was told how delicate her immune system would be, I had her in the doctor sometimes more than once a week. She did suffer through RSV several more times and pneumonia along with other illnesses. So much so that I learned to recognize the signs and treat at home as much as possible because she seemed to pick up more from the doctors office than we started with.

Our ped is the best and she helped as much as possible. I could call at anytime and speak directly with a nurse who would speak to the ped and help me as much as possible and advise me of when to bring her into the office.

Our family was also growing. In 2002 we had our ninth child. I felt a lot of stress during the pregnancy. I had a nervous breaksown, so to speak, shortly after Angelica was released from the rehab hospital.

I could not focus. I was always fearful when I went to work that I would never see her again. I was promoted. This was something I had worked so hard for. I finally pushed through all the prejudice and bias and achieved part one of my goals.

The problem was that I was not ready to put it first. All of a sudden life seemed so much more precious to me.

So, after just a couple of months, I talked to my superiors and explained how much I loved my job but I would either need ot step down or resign. They did not want me to resign but they would allow me to step down. Funny thing was that I was expected to perform the same duties but for less pay because the perosn that was in line to take my place was not realy ready. In fact, he just wanted a pay raise and he actually mad emy job so much harder until I did step down. He also amde some crazy stipulations which put me in a bad position and ultimately one of my direct supervisors kept constantly reminding me that the store was running so poorly because I stepped down and I didn't have to make the choice that I did.

When I found out I was pregnant with #9 all the feeling from Angelica's issues came rushing over me and I could not deal.

I could not imagine having to go to work and relive the fears constantly that another child may end up like her.

So, I began job hunting.

I found somehting I was interesting and that I would love and it had regular 8-4, M-F hours. I could have a real life and enjoy my time with the kids. I have never ever, since I started working at 15, had weekends off.

But it was a $11,000 pay cut annually. OUCH!!!

But we decided we could tighten things up and make it work.

Then just 5 months after I started, regardless of the fact that I was the second one to pass out of training class and my goals were exceeded, I was laid off along with a couple hundred others. I friend who did not lose her position that I was cut solely because I was pregnant and not a guarantee to return anyway. But I loved this job!

So, now I was seven months pregnant and for the first time ever, had to file unemployment. This actually worked because I could not find a job anyway and I did try. As soon as I got to the interview, they looked at my huge belly and I knew it was over.

So between the stress of having another baby after having one so injured and the devastation of a job loss I began retaining a ton of water. I did everything they advised but I really think the stress did not help. I ended up having really high blood pressure and having to be quickly induced.

But the peds and I were on the same page and we all wanted to prevent another reaction. He was given the same vaxes as Angelica, minus the Pertussis component.

So now her case is on its way and we just have to wait........and wait.......and wait.......and wait........

I will get back tomorrow and continue with the story.

Once again, I plead with all of you for your help in this cause. You have my permission to share and spread this link anywhere and everywhere you can.

Thank you!!!